My heart aches. I so want to be a positive influence in A's life but the way she is treating me and the things she is doing, I think she really just wants a bed and food. People tell me how much different I am from the other foster parents they come in contact with, that if A fells the program it won't be any fault of mine and this broke my heart also, as I figured we are all in this for one purpose, and that is to help these kids to the best of our ability.
The school personal tell me even "real" parents don't take as much interest in their own children as I do in A.
I was reminded the other day to cast all cares on HIM, which I have not been doing as much as I should. I know I can do nothing on my own. I learned this lesson a long time ago when I was going through my own therapy and healing. I've said this before once I let God take control things just fell into place.
I knew going into this new line of work that I would be taken advantage of, but it does hurt. I need to keep things in perspective.
Well my front yard is coming along. I finally got the cement ledge out. what a job that was. I thought I could just use a sledge hammer take the top 6" off then dig down a little way and pop out the footing, oh my what a job that was. The footing was a good 12-13" or more down. A friend of mine came over to help. Thank goodness for David.
Now what do I do with the yard? Am thinking of putting some gravel and keeping some grass for the dogs. Will rent a tiller in a few weeks take up the weeds and the little grass that I have there and start fresh with something. Anybody reading this, would like some ideas.
Am so missing my family back in Georgia. Am trying to get there in July.
The rain is coming. My hip and knee have been hurting all day. Only worked an hour or so outside today, just could not walk. Vicodin and a half plus some Motrin still hurting.
Good night and be blessed.
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